Actually, I celebrated my newfound freedom yesterday by falling flat on my face on the sofa the moment I got home and instantly dozing off. Haha, what a glamorous way to start.

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Karmel graduates today, and everyone in the house is excited about it. Graduation is such a promising word. We all study and tolerate whatever school throws at us in hopes that one day we'll get to taste the relief of finishing our schooling and being many steps closer to that coveted dream job and dream life. Of course, I still have three (or three plus, wag naman sana) years to spend in studying and tolerating but still, the idea of graduating serves as a handy and constant motivation to me during desperate, sleep- deprived times when I want to slam my head into a wall and just go AWOL on school.

I know, I know. Life after graduation isn't a happy- ever- after. But at least it's not hell.

I started the second year with sunshine in my face and certainty in my eyes. The first semester was hard but bearable. I began to appreciate little and otherwise ignored things, like school- free Saturdays and Gbox days. I turned 18, and it left me with a hint of optimism. Maybe, I thought, I can handle anything I put my mind into. The second semester came, and the flood of schoolwork that came with it left me struggling for time. As if on cue, personal problems also began to arise. The lantern parade was depressing. And I had what seemed like the shortest Christmas vacation ever.

So there. The next three months were fast, but not really. I found myself watching as events unfolded without me having to do anything. There were of course, happy times. The fieldtrips were lots of fun and there were random "detox" moments when we'd pretend that we're not stressed, but then when things got tough, they were unforgiving. The exams came and coffee soon became my savior/bestfriend/enemy. I got sick. I got tired. But I still didn't stop the coffee. Nevertheless, my sleeping pattern fluctuated.

There's no doubt that this semester has been the toughest half- year of my life so far. My resilience (in all aspects) has been stretched to points that were never reached before. There were a few times when I thought I was going to break. I didn't. And I'm very very thankful for that.

Needless to say, not everything is solved by 2 months of vacation. Right now I can still think of two unresolved things, but whatever. I need some time- out and they probably do so too, so maybe we can all get back to that in June.

For 60 days I promise to attend to my own happiness above all, and I intend to keep that promise.